Five Minutes

My mom and I circa 2007.
Seeing Josh Turner in concert at the county fair.
She was trying to take a picture with her BlackBerry.

My mind has been going a lot lately.
I move so fast,
so do my thoughts.

I can't concentrate.
I keep trying to start something,
like an art project
a new television show
a blog post-

and I can't sit still
I can't focus.

I thought I'd document my thoughts in a five-minute time period. 

My fingers are moving too quickly.
my clumsy fingers are bumping into too many keys at once
I keep misspelling words,
my grammar is off.

I need to keep going...

I'm thinking about this friend I had when I was twelve.
I think he was the only true friend I had.
He listened and so did I.
We wouldn't even have to talk- we could just look at each other
and know what the other was thinking
then bust out laughing.
He was sarcastic,
had a dry-witty personality.
I think I get some of my humor from him.
He got me,
even when I didn't.
I miss him.
He got sick too.
He's here, so close,
yet not.

There was this time in fourth grade,
we all had these special jobs that the teacher assigned,
I had to bring in the lunch boxes that were in this big laundry basket.
My friends came up and shoved down on it,
I dropped it.
They said I'd be nothing more than a reject
and walked away.
I was nine.

In seventh grade in English class I had to dress up like a cat
all black- pants, turtle neck
tail and ears.
I walked down the hall and the bell just happened to ring,
everyone was staring.
I was the weird girl dressed like a feline.
I think that was the first time anyone ever looked at me.

Remember Lizzie McGuire?
I thought so much that junior high would really be like that,
high school too.
That I'd have cute animal print trapper keepers in neon colors,
best friends I could count on
and a cute boy to crush on.
I knew that problems would happen,
but I'd still be there
with my pigtails in fuzzy pony tail holders
and a Gordo waiting at my door.

It never stops.
I'm so tired.


  1. Love the picture.
    Good friends are few and far between sadly.
    But yah know, I kinda like making new ones. There's so much promise and as we change we sorta need new ones I think.

  2. Oh my gosh I love your writing/poetry style girl. It's so amazing the way you're able to tell such a beautiful story in so few words. You are so talented. <3

    As for the story I can totally relate. I was that weird girl in Jr. High and most of High School. I had my circle of friends, but outside of that people were mean. I'm so glad that I've moved on from that.

    Julia @ That Hapa Chick

    1. Aw Julia that means so much to me, thank you so much!

      I'm so glad we were both able to move on from that :)

      Thank you! <3